I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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