You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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