grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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