he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
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