If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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