that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize