im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
