I hate all girls vehemently.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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