Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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