remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
