I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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