i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize