did you get engaged???
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Randomize
