Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
