i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
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