The best revenge is premature balding
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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