We need to start having sex underwater more often.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Randomize