I cannot find my penis.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
