If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Randomize
