D3 body, D1 cock
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
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