I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize