you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
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