I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize