you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
