Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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