Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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