imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
