absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Randomize
