Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
