I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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