to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
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He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
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