great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Randomize
