I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Randomize
