I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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