I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
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Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I fill condoms, not promises.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
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