i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
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