Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Randomize
