i just google imaged poop.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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