Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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