Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
