Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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