thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
