How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
