Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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