once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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