Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Randomize