Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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