Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
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LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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