i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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