is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
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