Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
